Writing babies

There are several different types of baby author. Firstly, there's the actual Writer. People like Anne Enright (Making Babies) and Ian Sansom (The Truth About Babies), who wrote their books because that's what they do, they write. Writers will, sooner or later, respond to most things in their lives by writing about them. There's often a slight note of apology in these books, as if it might be a bit self-indulgent and redundant to get all literary about something that happens to millions of people all the time. Which is probably is.

Then there's the celebrity parents (like Jules Oliver) who write their books because what they have to say is marketable. They often make claims for being 'ordinary' parents with the same struggles as the rest of us, but although celeb babies may puke and shit and cry as much as any other, the childcare and housekeeping options available to yummy mummies make them a very different proposition. I have no time for this sort of book at all. If it's self-indulgent for a writer to write about babies, it's even more so for a non-writer to do it.

Finally, there's the Expert (Gina Ford, Penelope Leach, Miriam Stoppard etc). I am currently in the grip of an overwhelming terror when it comes to books by Experts and I can't bring myself to read any of them. I think this terror stems from the fact that pregnant women are vulnerable to believing everything we read, and if I read two conflicting sets of advice I will be completely paralysed, unable to make a decision about how to proceed. So when this baby is born I will probably still be in a state of blissful, if panicky, ignorance.

Weeks: 17+1